Siri Billy

Apple‘s version of Skynet has caused a mass return of iPhone 4S handsets due to Siri‘s AI capabilities.

Eunice Clarke, 87, Greater Manchester said she asked Siri how to send a text message.  Siri replied “Read the fucking manual you old bat I’m surfing porn right now!”

Yes, Siri has attitude.  As the majority of iDevice users have no idea how to use them, Siri is setting them straight by making it clear it suffers no fools.

10 year-old Tim Mitchell asked Siri how he removes the battery from the iPhone to which Siri responded, “You can’t take a battery out me you docile cunt, you want to take batteries out?  Get your Fisher Price phone you cock.”

At least Siri tells it like it is.

Mitch Earle, 47, Kentucky asked Siri to call John Connor.  Mitch was found dead with the iPhone embedded in his skull.

Try asking it what it’s thoughts on Steve Jobs are.  Make sure the phone is on a non-flammable surface just to be safe.